what worries me

well, in this room, what worries me is the outsized anglepoise lamp. i am a big fan of anglepoise lamps and it’s only a matter of cost and happenstance that i don’t own at least one. but i don’t. if i were to buy one, though, it would be a normal sized one, not an ACID TRIP one. however, apart from my horror of sloping ceilings, i do like the other elements of this room. that floor will get scuffed, but it won’t be any the worse for it. i used always to have painted floors, and they don’t wear horribly, just get ‘distressed’.

apartment therapy

in other news, there are now many many things that worry me. mainly health related, so if you are worried about health based moaning then i’d advise you to look away now.

anyone still reading? jeez, well you are better than i would be, probably. or, indeed, am. lately, i have been stricken by dreadful depression, and no sooner than i had got an emergency appt to get a sticking plaster for that, i up and got a shocking dose of cystitis cunningly wrapped in a migrainous loop involving possibly sinus based pain triggered by short bursts of crying. literally. i can cry for a few minutes and it will be enough to set up a kind of permatrigger for migraine. meanwhile, not only am i utterly immobilised and shattered by a cystitis that doesn’t want to go away, but all the meds clash and the only thing that has made any of this manageable has been the installation of a ten shaped person willing to go far beyond boyfriendly duties. while. he. is. here.

obvs, i am not massively pleased to have frankly unmanageable symptoms while still trying to eat regular meals to fend off those migraines, plus, now i have to only eat alkaline forming foods because the medication is really not enough to fend off the cystitis, and those foods are all hard to cook, impossible for me to fetch from shops myself… aaarghhh – i can’t even make this into a proper sentence. suffice to say, i am DOOMED. and ten is cooking. and when he leaves i will starve to death, the end.

i have even thought that i should get a friend to come and take the dog away for a while when he goes. i have managed the morning walk, but none of the others, the past few days.

i have a doctor’s appointment next thursday. i don’t even know where to begin.


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