Solstice and Shenanigans

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Seasons greetings, whatever theological or tribal stripe you may be, on this, the Solstice, the nadir of the year. It will reach it’s very zenith at 17.11 GMT. Unfortunately, that does not mean that sunny days are ahead. They are, but they’ll be a long time coming. We will have to content ourselves with incremental increases in daylight hours.

Here is a beautifully crafted art work of festive cheer from Poppet’s oeuvre.

And here is a weird Victorian Christmas card.

In time travel news, here’s a picture from July 2012, but it is just as apt this very day, since WE’RE OFF TO BRIGHTON, YO!

However, just because we’ll be away from home, it doesn’t mean I won’t be cracking on with my new hobby, LEARNING ALL THE LANGUAGES.  I can’t remember who put me onto it (WHAAAT? it was all the way back a few DAYS I can’t be expected to remember EVERYTHING) but I am now big into duolingo.com which is a free software for learning languages. Not ALL the languages, but SOME languages. I am currently virtually fluent in Spanish as long as I only want to talk about apples, bread, water, milk, eating, drinking, a man, a woman, a girl and a boy. Still, I reckon I could get by on that. But there’s more! So much more. And it’s a bit like playing a game. I’m very excited.

Ten has just taken Poppet out for the shortest walk in the history of going outside, and I can hear him telling her she will have SOOOO MUCH FUN today, but I’m not sure she’s interested in tenses.

Gotta get ready to travel – in the meantime here’s a little tumblr I made the other day elaine4queen.tumblr.com/day/2013/12/14

Foam Slippers Redux

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I am not good at anniversaries. Even my 21st birthday was spent in the cab of a lorry in France. My friend Helen had got me a bottle of Orangina. Orangina was GREAT. We didn’t have anything as nice in the UK. As a kid I thought the war was AGES ago, but as the years went by I realized that even in the 80′s we were still very post war in lots of ways.

i was given these to wear in hospital. i kept them and brought them home to photograph

Anyway, last year I took an overdose of pills and ended up in the local mental hospital. Via the general hospital, I am told, I don’t remember it. My memories of that time are vague and very partial.

I’d had a hard year. Every year since I got ill has been a hard year, and I thought I knew hard years. I don’t suppose I was ever entirely at home with myself, but I had some good times, and with health comes the promise of future. Without health, well, not so much. I’d moved house in the early autumn. Ten had done all the stuff I couldn’t, and the difficult summer seemed to hold that seed of hope that moving might improve things. What I didn’t expect was a flare up of every single thing that fibro had ever brought me. Weeks of being bed bound with cystitis, constant running migraines, all sorts of everything. What had happened on top of this was that this time the previous year, going into the hardest part of the year I had started having a lot of suicidal thoughts and had gone to the doctor’s in a panic. I needed some support and was given it, and then had it taken away again. This played out over a few months, and in the early summer I saw a psychiatrist who said that I was taking too many different medications, so I started coming off them – unsupervised. The psych was on a ‘rotation’ I was supposed to see another one but that never happened. I moved without medication, knowing I was spiraling and since I was moving boroughs not only did I have to sign up with a new GP but would have to start from scratch with psych services.

It was hard to get appointments. I had rising panic. I felt like I was shouting for help – who knows, maybe it was just a whisper? Or maybe my shouting is someone else’s whisper. At any rate, eventually I had a home visit from *someone* – I forget who. I told her I needed a CPN (Community Psychiatric Nurse) to supervise me going on meds, since I was afraid of becoming manic. She told me that I wouldn’t get one unless I was hospitalized. By this time I heard ‘hospitalized’ not as  ‘turn up at hospital and tell them you need in’ but as ‘take an overdose and you’ll either die or get help’ which sounded like a win/win scenario to me.

This time last year, or, to be more specific, a bit later than that… I wrote this post and made light of it, rather. I was ready to show but not to tell.

I wanted to write this for two reasons. One, in a show of solidarity with all the other people in the UK who are currently literally being hounded to death by the current government’s sickness and disability ‘reforms’ and another to say thank you to everyone who helped me through that very dark time.

Ten, Hazel & Che, BJ, Lottie, Ian, Al, Lucy J, St Ann’s Home Team, my lovely friends on the interwebs, everyone who came to my birthday, Steven next door, my dad who wasn’t told at the time, but who takes me as I am whatever state I am in, my mum, my brother, Julie, who gave me holiday time in Brighton, and my darling little Poppet, this one’s for you:

This year has been so much better. Many difficult days, but better, always better than last year.

This Year, Last Year, Sometime, Never

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austin kleon

And good morrow to you! I take it we have all given up on resolutions? Good.

GrrrlFever Zine Issue #1

I reject virginity and I reject nominal ‘New Years’. Since I am a bit of a howler what I don’t reject is the full moons and the shiftings of the year. Straight after the solstice I was heartened to think that the days will, though still dark, be getting lighter forthwith.

I am not good with anniversaries of any kind. I find them… implausible? I keep a count of how many years I have had Poppet – it’s easy because I went to get her on xmas eve three years ago. I know I am fifty, but when I was forty I had to be 39 twice because I’d lost a year somewhere. This is as it should be, in my opinion.

And now I give you a tumblr collection by way of a new year’s gift elaine4queen.tumblr.com/day/2013/01/03

donald edwards

dog day holiday

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quite naturally, i failed to either bring my camera charger or simply charge the battery, so this post is brought to you by the letters FFS and the number LOW RES camphone. or it could be more about the weird picasa configuration on this netbook. I DON’T KNOW!

good morrow

poppet is having the BEST time. we are visiting with another staffie, the tiny diva.

here, diva, aged 105 in human years, accepts small pinches of chappie hand fed to her. she is so old and picky it’s hard to get her to eat anything, and she is well disposed towards being fed by hand.
the two dogs have become lovely friends. i hope to get some sort of snap of them being sweet together, but it’s a bit of a lottery.

picasion

picasion.

here’s hazel and pops AT THE PUB!!!! yes, this truly is poppet’s dream holiday.

(and i am enjoying it, too)

when we first got here we took her into the garden, but now it’s pretty much out of bounds, since there are two guinea pigs which she spent a solid day obsessing about.

last night the usually reticent diva decided to show us THE BEACH. poppet was transFIXED. she stared at the sea through the railings like some sort of dog beggar girl glimpsing a fabulous banquet.

this avo we walked up to the racecourse, which she enjoyed, and I, gentle reader, HAVE HAD NO MIGRAINES! (and i have even had glasses of wine!)

two more whole days to go. and a bit. ten is in the kitchen kicking up a storm, while we watch the opening of the olympics.

che took this little gem

holiday time! botox for migraine, and waffling on about the olympics – and a poll! many good things!

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we’re going to bri-ghton! we’re going to bri-ghton!

we were going to wales, but i got an appointment at the migraine clinic bang in the middle of our proposed travelly time, and had to cancel. wales is too far to go for less than a week. brighton, on the other hand, isn’t. in m’previous post i linked to a little tumblr i made with the purpose of fishing for holiday swapsies. i didn’t get the swap i constructed the thing for, but it occurred to me to show it around to brighton peeps, and one such friend actually happened to need a dog/house sitter for the latter half of this very week.

so excited. the doggy we are visiting is the one who inspired me to adopt a staffie. she is an old girl now, but i’ve known her since she was a pup, and she’s a lovely girl.

do not fear. THERE WILL BE PHOTOS. oh yes.

i don’t know if we will see everyone this time round, but i do know there will be group dog walks. that’s it. i don’t know anything else.

we will go look at the sea, too. but i don’t know the summer dog on beach rules, so we will have to find out about all that.

and, “hollybags”? don’t ask me. i think it was one of the kirsties who coined it. or at least, passed it on to me. for safekeeping, like.

***

the national migraine centre is a private charity, not part of the NHS. it’s been run by a famous Dr, Anne MacGregor, who has dedicated herself to researching the part hormones play in migraine. when i went to see my neuro at whitechapel last year, for what i assumed would be the last time because i was moving out of the borough it turned out that he was moving on, too. Dr MacGregor is off to concentrate on research at barts, and he, Dr Giles Elrington, is taking over at the migraine clinic. I’d stopped going there because being a chronic, paying every visit wasn’t an option. He told me he would waive the fee for me, though.

giles. he’s so posh he really does wear a bow tie.

the suggested donation is currently £100. so, not inconsiderable. what i will be happy to pay for, though, is the botox treatment. this is his hobby horse. it’s been approved by NICE (national institute for clinical excellence – our FDA) but the NHS trusts all have to decide whether to bank roll it, and they are taking their sweet time.

at £600 a time it’s not cheap (which i don’t really understand, since botox is actually not expensive in itself) but if you are a chronic like me then neither is almost daily use of triptans, and in a more general way, an inability to do a day’s work. i think i cost the state a good deal more than £600 a quarter.

IF he can whip out the needle on tuesday i will be very pleased. i have had botox before and it worked really well. apparently you need to give it a couple of goes to see if it’s not just a placebo effect, but it could become cost effective if it meant i could work. what i would work at is a whole other question. of course, i have the fibro to contend with as well. my attempt to swim myself well not only sparked more migraines than i could cope with, but also quite a bit of IBS related flare ups. and then there was the fatigue… so it’s not a cut and dried situation, but bloody hell, i am sick and tired of being sick and tired, so lets give it a whirl.

***

i’m slightly weeing myself with excitement over what possible escapades protesters might get up to during the olympics. people are being arrested for the slightest thing at the moment, though, so they’ll have to be smart. i’ve written a whole waffle about it, but it’s not been posted yet.

and, speaking of waffling, you may note that i am writing like a normal person over there. i felt it was the way to go. trouble is, now i am all sixes and sevens about capitalization. what do YOU think?

my online life

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WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

i am proud to announce my first post as a daily waffle writer! here it is to click on;

how to make a dog smile.

i feel a little bit NOIVOUS. i feel a bit of a fraud constantly categorizing and tagging this blog with “HUMOUR”, and i felt very bambi trying out his first steps writing even such a short thing and using the FUNNY WAFFLE category. cheeky me! after all, is it really for me to say that i am bringing the funnies? well, at least the picture is worth a smirk. if not a LOL. in a sneak previewy sort of a way i am going to tell you something about what i want to do in the future on the waffle – i want to do some drawings. nothing fancy, but you know, i feel perfectly free to gank images for this blog, but i do feel that copyright infringement starts getting a bit naughty at a certain point. and it gives me an excuse to wield a crayon. i did a little one for this blog last week. it was the star i used to illustrate the idea of ‘gold stars all round’.

i didn’t really like the stars i found when i did an image search, so i just drew one. it only took me a few minutes. okay, it doesn’t actually glitter, and it’s not really gold. but i drew it on top of my crayon box which is a kind of grubby gold.

anyway, that’s the plan, and you heard it here first.

***

now, you may remember that i got a nice award recently, but i didn’t pay it forward because, for starters no one, NO ONE even accepted the last one that i did, and for nexters i was in the middle of migraine awareness month and my birthday and i wasn’t keeping up with reading blogs.

however! this has now been rectified, and i can tell you that i have read some great blogs over the past few days. one such is from a blog called ‘becoming cliche’ and the post is called it really works and it is all about how dieting in the style of a cat is the new atkins. i thought it was very funny so click through if you like a laugh.

***

just in case you’d prefer to be bummed out, there’s this from my facebook feed;

“The armed forces are already providing up to 13,500 personnel for the Games – split between the venues and back-up for police. Under the contingency plans, this could reach 16,500 – 7,000 more than are being deployed in Afghanistan.”

so, erm, you know the UK is supposed to be quite *free* and a *democracy* and all that? well, not content to arm the police (our police weren’t at all armed until fairly recently, then there were ‘armed units’ which were only to be deployed on actual specific missions and yesterday when i went to buy a bra in M&S there were two policemen just standing around at liverpool street station HOLDING BIG BLACK MACHINE GUNS. i’d go back and take a picture but i am too scared – i don’t want to be arrested or shot.) we are apparently now going to have the army not only manning ground to air missiles on the top of residential blocks in the borough, but also policing the damn games!

read more here Olympic security: army reinforcements called in to fill G4S shortfall if you can bear to, that is.

BLOODY GREAT BIG SADFACE.

libraries, poppet, art stuff, colourbox, scottish referendum, gardening, instapaper, tea, workfare, cooking.

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1. soooo… ANGRY at this. sneaky FUCKERS. and not in a good way. what body of people moves *things* at 2am when they feel comfortable and legal and whatnot with their decision to do it?

almost particularly when those *things* are BOOKS. BOOKS! people! stripping a whole library at 2am. and now i am really going to swear.

MOTHER FUCKING FUCKERS.

2. poppet all better, and taking the best seat in the house (well, garden).

harraw!

she’s doing well. i think the ear with the stitches in it might get itchy at some point and i will have to put the lampshade back on but she’s mostly NAKED and happily putting it all behind her. and yesterday we went out with mark and charlie, so she had lots of bull terrier fun with her young luvvahboy.

3. these look like some groovy sites for sharing your creative journey. not being active in the visual art world i hadn’t heard of most of them, but i have seen the colour one before. big fan of colour/color.

4. play some more of that colourbox stuff again!

*

5. so much for 2012. you’d think it was the END OF TIME the way people are going on about it. there will be life after the olympics, and there is a whole nother EVENT to look forward to. or, at least, there is for those that are interested in these things. september 2014 heralds a referendum on scottish independence. the debates are starting now. you can read a bit about it here if you’ve a passing interest.

IN THE 70′S THERE WAS A REFERENDUM FOR A SCOTTISH PARLIAMENT. ONE OF THEIR SLOGANS WAS “IT’S OOR OIL”.

i don’t live there any more, as you know, so will not get a vote. on the one hand, it will be bad for england if scotland becomes independent, at least in the short term, because MANY more people vote tory here. on the other hand it may radicalize people even more than the occupy/banking crisis/workfare stuff is doing already. and if scotland did become a kind of english speaking scandinavian country that would be kind of cool.

for them.

however, there is another side of NATIONALISM. as amy from lucy’s football  likes to say “what have we learned?” well, we have learned that nationalism can get a bit RACIST. yes it can.

think ON, scotland.

6. i’ve had my mum visiting, for the past few days, from scotland. we’ve been having a heatwave and have spent most of the time in the garden. this has meant that i have started FIDDLING with things. i’ve moved plants around, de-strangled some of the things i’d like to live, and banished the ferny thing to the bit where there is just london clay and pebbles. nothing else will grow there anyway, and it looks nice. you just can’t let it ENCROACH is all.

ferny thing. nice enough, and welcome in the pebbly clay, but a bit of an encroacher.

most things that i have moved have seemed happier where i have put them. all except a really sad poppy which hung it’s head tragically post move. it may rally overnight or it may not. i’ve not moved a poppy before.

i’ve put in some of my neighbour’s herb robert, and am excited about it. you can have the leaf tips as a tea.

7. you know what i like? instapaper. can’t remember where it was recommended, but i have been using it lots. it’s great for people who end up with more tabs than they can even see on their desktop. with it, you can just save a page for later IN THE CLOUD and happily close some tabs. it’s like having a good memory. most pleasing.

8. here’s something for our ken;

it isn’t credited on tumblr, which usually means i won’t post, but it’s too good not to show at least my blogging homies. 21,059 reblogs, as well! i wonder if the OP even knows that… no hits on tineye either.

9. you may notice that i yammer on about ‘workfare’ now and then. if you are not in the uk you might think ‘what on earth is she banging on about?’ especially if you don’t realize i am seriously unable to work for a living. here is a guardian column in which the writer covers quite a few of the things that make me worried and ballistic by turns.

10. sorry to whoever i nicked this from on twitter, but here is a hilarious tumblr pipcooksthebooks where the eponymous pip shows us the difference between the ‘showroom’ version of the dish and what it actually looks like when a normal person tries it. you have to click through. i’m not even going to try to find my favourite.

my mass observation day

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mass observation day was yesterday, May 12th. here is my diary of the day.

background info.

i am a 49yo woman. i live in tottenham, on the ferry lane estate. i have a garden flat which backs on to the river lea. i have lived here since last september, having spent the last 20 years in the east end. i am single. i have been in a relationship for a year, and my boyfriend, tenyen is often here. i have a dog, a rescued staffordshire bull terrier called poppet. i am not working. i was a lecturer in art and design and have worked in theatre. i became too ill to work 10 years ago. i have fibromyalgia and chronic migraine and am diagnosed unipolar.

12 May this year was the first sunny day in a long while. i have been under particular duress recently because of the govt workfare programme. the night before i was particularly unable to focus, and took morning drugs instead of evening drugs, so only got two hours sleep.

***

woke at 6am. took my morning medication; 500mg naproxen (pain killer), 75mg venlafaxine (mood elevator), 15mg lansoprazole (to protect my stomach from the pain meds), and 10mg loratadine (antihistamine).

back to bed til 7.40. (gives a chance for the pain killers to work) had a large mug of tea. ten slept in the sitting room last night, which he often does because i go to bed so early. he comes in with me for tea. i have the laptop on in bed and download revenge to watch later on. after i’ve had tea, i take the dog out. ten offers to take her, but i feel ok at this point, and knowing it is likely he will have to walk her later i take the opportunity that having some energy presents.

it’s a sunny day. we see a lot of poppet’s friends, and i take photos of them. i walk round the park with one of my neighbours, paul, and tell him about mass observation day. he tells me that he liked the documentary series 7 Up which followed 14 7 year olds every 7 years from 1964. coincidentally, 56 Up is scheduled for tomorrow night. just before i get indoors i bump into a neigbour, phil, who offers to take a look at my garden for me, tell me what indeterminate plants are weeds, and he tells me he will have his dog, a retired greyhound, put down this autumn, since she has suffered so badly this winter with arthritis.

my next door neighbour, steven, has been away for a few days, so i ring his doorbell, and poppet and i go in to say hello before we go home.

when i get home i have a bath and change of clothes (i tend to do first walk in the day before’s clothes) and have a discussion with ten about sun screen. i wear a vest with invisible support (much more comfortable than a bra), a pair of yoga pants and a cardigan. i am planning on doing some weeding because the last few weeks of rain has left the garden a bit wild, and this is my first chance to get out there. he believes i should have sun screen on, i am not so sure. (i would have given in if i had ended up spending any real amount of time out there, but as it was i went out in short bursts and not for very long).

i go out for about 20 mins, and pull up some of what i know are weeds, and am suddenly very tired and rather shivery. ten tells me to rest, and i go back into bed and watch revenge on the laptop. it’s rubbish, really, but it passes the time very well.

i go back outside until 12.15. chris upstairs is on his balcony, he says hello. and the italian girl and her boyfriend and their 4 dogs stop to say hello to poppet through the fence. we chat briefly about the dogs.

i am too tired to cook, so ten makes the lunch. he’s bought some salmon and broccoli because he went out to shops last night. we are a bit cut off here, so i do a big shop every couple of weeks and we top up now and then. i can hardly sit up at the table to eat, so when i am finished i go back to  bed properly. i listen to a couple of radio shows, radio 4′s all in the mind which is about a prison that is run as a theraputic community, and the life scientific about the guy who invented gaia theory. i had heard it before, but in this state, pretty much just wanted a comforting blah blah blah to listen to. i laid down til 2.15. i’d had two texts, both from specsavers promoting their latest offer. i don’t get as many texts as i used to.

i go through to the sitting room. ten is on a netbook doing emails, and poppet is snuggled up next to him. i join them on the sofa. after a while i rally a little and go out to the garden to do a little more.

i go back into the bedroom and post the pictures i took of the walk on my blog. i am glad i took these photos, because they tell a story on their own, and i am not well enough to write. i had planned to photograph the whole day, but ran out of steam after the walk. i’d been taking quite good notes during the day, but had to check what time i posted the photos – it was 4pm. i tidy away the tools and things. ten has put the weeds in the compost bin he has made.

after that i sit in the sitting room with my laptop, looking at twitter and facebook and reading blogs. ten says he will take poppet on her last walk before he cycles home (in south london) if i sort out my medication in a way which will stop me from taking morning pills at night. i am more than happy to do this, since lying in bed awake but too tired to do anything for 8 hours is not my idea of fun, and it messes up the next few days quite badly too. i have never made this particular mistake before, but have done it twice recently and really mustn’t. it is horrible.

after that, although it is only 6pm, i throw the towel in completely and go to bed properly. i sometimes go to bed as early as half seven, but try to stay up til 9, so this is really admitting defeat. i take my medication (500mg naproxen and 150mg quetiapine – an antipsychotic, which will help me sleep) and fall asleep almost immediately. i don’t even hear ten leave. i wake up at 3 and have to take a sumatriptan for the inevitable migraine. i don’t usually go without meals, but i couldn’t face food and didn’t stay awake long enough to have a complan (vitamin enriched milky drink. i have it with soya milk). even if i had had a meal though, i was unlikely to avoid a migraine. i fall asleep listening to an oliver sacks audiobook. i don’t remember any of it, i will have to listen from the beginning again.

***

I donate my 12th May diary to the Mass Observation Archive. I consent to it being made publicly available as part of the Archive and assign my copyright in the diary to the Mass Observation Archive Trustees so that it can be reproduced in full or in part on websites, in publications and in broadcasts as approved by the Trustees.

moar fashion news

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in my last post my fashion predictions for 2012 i told you what i expected to get from my imminent trip to TK MAXX.

“But nothing disturbs the feeling of specialness like the presence of other human beings feeling identically special.” ― Jonathan Franzen, Freedom

(photo and quote put together by slaughterhouse 90210, click through pic to see this great tumblr)

did you spot my mistake? yes. you’re right. TK MAXX is the modern version of a jumble sale. you can’t really predict what you’re going to get. not based on what was in the shops and on the streets last summer anyway, as it turns out. obvs, if i had hauled myself off to the actual shops that sold said breton inspired tops and orchestra pit dresses i might have stood a better chance, but who wants to go INTO TOWN? not me.

as it was, i did very well. as a young thing full of the joys of clobber (and at art school, i might add) i LOVED clothes and happily went on buses all over the place to hit three jumble sales in a day. i would come home flushed with excitement, having forgotten most of what i had bought, so would have a fine time rediscovering and trying on my haul. happy days. happy days when i didn’t mind being a bit uncomfortable in my clothes as long as i looked AMAZING which i did, since i was skinny as a whippet and looked good in anything.

nowadays i am not skinny, i am not young, and i want to be very comfortable in my clothes. but having been a fashionista i am a bit picky about what i look like even so. so the trick is all about looking presentable (in my version of what that is) as well as being secretly as comfy as hell.

i have no wish to mock people who wear track suit bottoms, but i am not one of them. it’s a whole look, and i don’t do it. plus, i have seen trackie bottoms up close, and fail to believe that the heavily concertinaed waistband of thick material could be any kind of comfy on my waist, which is both fattish and highly sensitive.

SO. enter the yoga pant. having actually done yoga for several years, i had a working introduction to this garment. i can tell you that it is hard to find an uncomfortable pair of yoga pants. also, they are cut nicely, made of breatheable material, have a little flare rather than the runner’s max wall effect footless tight look, and sometimes they also come with what is known as a ‘soft’ waistband, which is every kind of comfy you can think of.

happily, you actually can bet on TK MAXX to have yoga pants. perhaps especially this time of year when everyone who has more money than sense or a highly developed sense of new year’s resolutionitis is hitting the shops for sports gear. this, at any rate, worked in my favour. i got three pairs of yoga pants and a pair of max walls for wearing with boots instead of leggings because they had a soft top, and as you have just seen, i am all about the soft.

not only did i win at buying legwear in a general sense, but also, two of them were from an ‘eco’ company, and are super soft due to having bamboo as one of the fibres. bamboo is FAB in textiles if you like soft. i actually have some bamboo towels, and they are not only soft but also super light. despite the vaunted eco credentials, they were not stupid enough to forego a dose of elastine, which would have been a deal breaker. i spent the late 80s in leggings which bagged out at the knee after a short while of wearing and i have no interest in turning back that particular clock.

obviously, i did not turn up at the shop and head straight for the sensibles. i tried on a handful of dresses first. awful, they were. experimental side satisfied i was happy to get on task. after getting my yoga pantage sorted out i headed for shoes in the vain hope that my perfect pair of walking boots would be waiting for me in a little bubble invisible to all but me, but it was not to be so. i tried on some serious trudgers which were designed to be totally impervious to wet, and if i lived somewhere where snow was more guaranteed then i might have given in to temptation, but i couldn’t justify their expense, and bought a pair of trainers instead.

reader, i seriously didn’t already own a pair. i know you went straight to “another pair of trainers, who needs more than one?” but it was a genuine gap in my wardrobe. i’d spent the past year or two living in MBTs, which, i can report, are generally comfy, but if you ‘off road’ to the slightest extent you will go over on your ankle. moving to what passes for ‘the country’ in my mind (zone three, i mean, it’s nearly outer london, i have a suburban landline number!) i wanted a proper pair of walking shoes next. as it happens i ended up with some timberlands which are okay, though not the walking boot of my dreams. the transition was remarkably painful, MBTs give you this rocking gait, and it makes a whole slew of small muscles lazy. however, the timberlands have a rigid sole, so another compensation. i have worn the trainers twice, now, to take the dog out. and my but isn’t it nice to have a full action including the toes? i am really enjoying the stretch of just that simple addition of articulating the toes.

post shop, i am heavily fantasizing about going back and doing more. but winning at shopping is also about knowing when to stop. when i lived in bethnal green i had a street market nearby which sold french connection, toast, farhi, and great plains stuff for super cheaps. often, i could get three things for a tenner, so a total wardrobe overhaul for twenty quid. i have to remember that although TK MAXX is cheap, it’s not that cheap.

so anyway, that’s all the fashion news. i didn’t get a slew of stripey tops, i did get enough yoga pants to stay comfortable, both mentally and physically, for the near future. i didn’t get walking boots, but then i believe i might have to go to a shop where they have a selection of them to really get the dream boot sorted out, but i did get trainers, and everyone needs trainers. i did not get any number of fancy bits of tat that i would have to hide from @tenyen.

i win at shopping.